#30 Dating Coworkers
Posted in List on Mar 17th, 2009
Let’s just say there is no shortage of intercompany transactions. Enough said.
Category Archive for 'List'
#29 Perfectly Aligned Hole Punching
Posted in List on Mar 16th, 2009
Accountants are anal retentive, because if they weren’t, they wouldn’t be accountants. This anal retentive nature shows up in everything they do, including: placing post-it flags, mailing confirmations, taking coffee orders, copying tickmark legends, updating the pending list, photocopying binders, binder clipping packets, parking in the same spot, footing figures, tying workpaper references, stapling workpapers, […]
#28 Free Parking
Posted in List on Mar 11th, 2009
Accountants make a decent living and can afford to spend $3 at Starbucks every day of the year. However, when asked to pay for parking, you’d think their materiality threshold just split in half. Since accountants hate paying for parking, it stands to reason that they love free parking. Free parking is a big deal. […]
#27 Office Perks, What are your favorites?
Posted in List on Mar 9th, 2009
Free beverages are just the tip of the iceberg. Try health-conscious snacks, gourmet meals, and espresso machines – all for free. Any office has pens and staplers, but does your office have a nickel vending machine? Every office has a break room, but does your office have a nap room? Accountants are experts at abusing […]
#26 Privacy Screen
Posted in List on Mar 6th, 2009
When an accountant receives their laptop, there is a whole set of rituals to follow. First, they receive the manufacturer’s manual (never to be read) and the company laptop bag (bulky enough to stop bullets). Then without fail, accountants put an order to their IT department for an extra power cord, a privacy screen, and […]
#25 Lunchtime
Posted in List on Mar 4th, 2009
Accountants look forward to lunchtime. Lunchtime, where an accountant sits at their desk eating while working, doesn’t count. For accountants, eating lunch is an officially sanctioned measurement of time. Things happen before lunch or after lunch. That is until you get to working past midnight. Picking where to eat lunch is also a VERY big […]
#24 Softcopies
Posted in List on Mar 2nd, 2009
Accountants love working in Excel, and they didn’t get this way sorting a thousand rows by hand. You can thank softcopies for misplaced USB thumb drives full of sensitive information and confusing e-document retention policies. Softcopies are the electronic source of the paper printout. Before a schedule is printed out, it typically exists in a […]
#23 Copy Machines
Posted in List on Feb 27th, 2009
Accountants rely on tools to make their workload a bit more manageable. One tool accountants require is a copy machine. It’s at the top of their list of things needed to get work done, and it also holds a top spot on the list of most tedious tasks. Paperless workflow? Please, accountants use so much […]
#22 Confidential Records
Posted in List on Feb 25th, 2009
Though you’ll be hard pressed to find one who openly admits it, accountants love reading this stuff. Stock grants, board minutes, commission payouts, employee resumes, ADP wages, and so on. Accountants love reading confidential records when they think nobody is watching over them. Accountants routinely handle sensitive data and have entered into confidentiality agreements to […]
#21 Cat 5e Ethernet Cables
Posted in List on Feb 23rd, 2009
You might be an accountant if… You carry around a document retention box filled with office supplies and tangled cat5 cables. Accountants go through these cables like candy. They are easy to misplace and constantly ‘borrowed’ by other accountants never to be seen again. Cat 5e ethernet cables are the standard cables used for wired […]